Stage Four: Trying to Cope

Once a woman has experienced the roller coaster of emotions associated with discovering the depth of her partner’s porn problem, she usually feels compelled to take some kind of action. Often she will not leave the relationship, at least not right away. More often, she is likely to do some­thing to try to control or fix the porn problem herself. This desire for control is completely understandable—it is an attempt to overcome the feelings of powerlessness in a situation where trust, honesty, and fidelity have been destroyed.