Communication, sexual or otherwise, is most successful when it is two-sided, involving both an effective communicator and an active listener. In this section, we focus on the listening side of this process.
Have you ever wondered why certain people seem to draw others to themselves like iron to a magnet? With some thought, you will probably conclude that, among other things, these individuals are often good listeners. What special skills do they possess that make us feel that they really care about what we have to say? The next time you are with such a person, observe closely. Make a study of his or her listening habits. Perhaps your list of good listening traits will include several of the following: being an active listener, maintaining eye contact, providing feedback, supporting one’s partner’s communication efforts, and expressing unconditional positive regard.