Women became angry at men in part because they compared themselves to the successful heterosexual white man — not to the plight of the black and native American man, or to the ostracism of the gay man, or the invisibility of the poor man. But this was only part of it.. . Women as the […]

Today, when the successful single woman meets the successful single man, they appear to be equals. But should they marry and consider children, she almost invariably’ considers three options: Option 01: Work full time Option 02: Mother full time Option 03: Some combination of working and mothering He considers three slightly different options: Option 01: […]

Abigail, a typical 1890s woman, had eight children. She almost died twice in childbirth. By the lime her last child left the house, she was dead. Cindy, a typical 1990s woman, was single until she was 25 After she married, she bore two children. When her last child left the house, she had another quarter […]

Practically speaking, when more than 90 percent of women got married and divorce was rare, discrimination in favor of men at work meant discrim­ination in favor of their wives at home. When workplace discrimination worked in favor of women at home, no one called it sexism. Why? It was working for women. Only when discrim­ination […]

Couples who pursued Stage II values created a new set of problems, the very qualities that made a perfect couple in a Stage I marriage made them perfect for divorce in a Stage II marriage — she was seen as preoccupied with the home and b-o-r-i-n*g.. .; he was seen as preoccupied with work — […]

My mom used to say, "When the money stops coming in the door, the love starts going out the window.” Brian, 41, discussing the unwritten rule of Stage 1 love It is tempting to think of Stage II love as unconditional love. In practice, it is more conditional. Couples now expea communication skills, joint parent­ing, […]

From role mate to soul mate For thousands of years, most marriages were in Stage I — survival-focused. After World War II, marriages increasingly flirted with Stage II — a self- fulfillment focus. In Stage I, most couples were role mates: the woman raised the children and the man raised the money. In Stage II, […]

In the early years of the women’s movement, an article in Psychology Today called "Women as Nigger" quickly led to feminist activists (myself included) making parallels between the oppression of women and blacks.28 Men were characterized as the oppressors, the "master," the "slaveholders". Black congresswoman Shirley Chisholm’s statement that she faced far more discrimination as […]

ITEM Steve Petrix was a journalist who lived near me in San Diego Every day he returned home to have lunch with his wife. Recently, as he got near his door, he heard his wife screaming. She was being attacked with a knife. Steve fought the assailant off his wife His wife ran to call […]

The media popularizes studies reporting women’s greater amount of lime spent on housework and child care, concluding: women work two jobs, men work one But this is misleading. Women do work more hours inside the home, but men work more hours outside the home And the average man commutes farther and spends more time doing […]