So far we’ve been talking about how difficult it can be to communicate with the people in our lives. What about talking to our intimate partner about sex? Sex can be one of the hardest topics to discuss. Let’s talk about why this might be so. Talking With Your Partner About Sex How do you […]

Overall, verbal disagreements aren’t a bad thing in relationships. In fact, couples who disagree are usually happier than those who say “We never, ever fight!” Disagreements are a common part of relationships. (It’s important to point out, however, that verbal disagreements are different from physical disagreements. We will discuss domestic vio­lence in Chapter 17.) As […]

We all get angry sometimes, and we know that not all conversations have happy, peaceful endings. However, the key is in managing the tension. When we disagree with our partner, the opening minutes of a disagreement can indicate whether or not the conversation will turn angry or simply be a quiet discussion (P. Coleman, 2002). […]

Men and women have been found to listen for different things when they engage in con­versation (DeLange, 1995). As we mentioned earlier, men typically listen for the bot­tom line or to find out what action needs to be taken to improve the situation, whereas women listen for details. This helps explain why men and women […]

When walking across campus one day, you trip and fall down. Your partner sees you and says, “Please be careful!” How do you interpret that? Does it mean that you’re moving too fast? You need to slow down? Does it mean that your partner is gen­uinely worried you might hurt yourself? In all conversations, the […]

It’s tough to be a good listener these days. We all have so many things going on at one time that it makes it difficult to really focus on what our partner is saying. Because we all have “buttons” that our partners can push, it’s important to know what these buttons are. For instance, two […]

The majority of couples spend too much time criticizing each other and not enough time really listening and making affectionate comments (P. Coleman, 2002). One partner of­ten becomes defensive and angry when the other says something he or she doesn’t want to hear. For example, if your partner told you that he felt you weren’t […]

Even though communication is important, it is not always easy. Telling your partner what you really want and need during sexual activity can be very difficult. This is be­cause sexuality is an area in which many people feel insecure. People may wonder if they are good lovers and worry that their partners do not think […]