This strategy involves recognizing and staying connected with the serious consequences and problems you have already experienced, as well as identifying what future problems continued porn use could bring. The more you are consciously aware of the specific ways porn has hurt you in the past, continues to damage your life in the present, and threatens your well-being in the future, the more motivated you will be to stay on track in your efforts to quit using porn. This is an important step, because many porn users have become accustomed to turning a blind eye to many of the problems associated with their habit.
When a porn user automatically dismisses from his awareness the negative consequences of his porn use, he is operating in denial. Denial can be a very effective method for someone who wants to focus on the benefits of porn and, at the same time, keep problems that porn use causes out of his conscious awareness. In order to stay motivated and be successful in quitting porn, the denial process must be deactivated. Identifying and acknowledging the problems that porn use has resulted in for you and others brings these problems into conscious awareness and consequently can go a long way in helping to neutralize denial, especially if this is done on an ongoing basis over time.
There are a number of ways to stay in touch with the negative consequences of porn use. Talking with a trusted friend or counselor about current and potential problems, writing down your experiences and concerns in a journal, and taking regular time for self-reflection can be help — ful. You may also want to refer back to the list of negative consequences of using porn in chapter 4, on page 72, and identify which repercussions from porn use apply to you. In addition, you may want to do the following exercise, “How Porn Is a Problem for Me.”